Friday, November 27, 2009 '

grown up!

Oh well~ It's been 2 weeks since I blog, so shall update about my life for these days. I found a job at tpy, working as an assistant teacher in a preschool, means nursery and kinder garden. Started working for a week or so, and I'm glad that i work there coz working with kids is really great. I was assigned to K1 B class and those kids are really fun. XD I enjoyed my this one week there, and will continue to work there coz I really enjoy the working environment.

People do say children create laughter, and will brighten up the atmosphere. And I agree with this, coz those kids are really such a joy. Sometimes u wouldn't expect what they will do and all that. Ytd was their concert where they got to dance one english song and one chinese song. Before their turn to perform, we were in the class waiting. They were so hyper, ran around, talk to each other.

I experienced a sense of warmth and lovely feeling ytd when I was in the class with the 19 kids waiting for their turn to perform. 1 of the little girls just came to me and sit on my lap naturally, just like very close to me. Soon, a few more kids crowd around me and wanted to talk to me. Though I was only there for 1 week, u can feel that those kids were somehow attached to u and become closer to u as the days go by. And the most happy thing is they remembered my name just 1 day after. ^^

Perhaps that's the motivation for me everyday to wake up early in the morning to go quite a far place to work. Though sometimes I feel sleepy, once I think of those lovely kids, I got the signal to get up of my bed and prepare to have a full lovely day ahead. I guess that was the only motivation for me everyday, and now then I know that my life can be such a wonderful thing as I never experienced it before.

Ever since I work, I don't have much time for u my dear. But then, try to bear with me ya? Try to understand me a little, coz sometimes, I also don't want it to be like that. And am i really a changed person? I also don't understand why, but then, I felt a little ache in my heart when i heard that. Just let it be I guess, time will heal.

~Perhaps I am a changed person... ~

*If it's wrong to love u, then my heart just wouldn't let me be right*
8:58 PM

Tuesday, November 17, 2009 '

happy vs vexed

Today my parents and my 4 sis returned from their trip to HK. Was looking forward to it coz I really miss them lots. Went down to the airport with laogong and my grandma to fetch them. Saw them coming out from the arrival hall, was really happy to see them expecially twinees. Miss the days when they weren't around with me. Hug them when I saw them, but to them, I'm like a stranger, like they don't recognise me somehow.

Saw my dad, but his face was so black, wonder what happen to him. Then took taxi home, my sis told me all the things that happen. Either my dad got some dispute with my mum, or my dad got disputes with my sis all that. Felt a little giddy in the taxi, but then still ok.

Reached home and I felt that home is still the best. But here comes the unhappy part. Don't know why they went HK for 4 days, all came back like alot of days didn't shout or angry. Then keep on shouting and make noise all that, made me feeling super giddy and vexed. My sis bought for me a pink wallet, was really happy about it. And i asked my mum to buy the white colour monkey T-shirt for laogong, they did, was feeling happy at 1st.

But then, asked my sis help clear up the mess the twinees created, she said she busy. So i helped to clean up. Then she asked me to exchange the wallet with her. Coz her friend wanted the pink one, asked me to have the blue one. I'm already vexed, then I told her I don't want it. She said she at first already planned to give me either purple or blue. Then? Still asked me to choose myself the colour I want? =( Forget it ba~

Then my dad said I lied to him last time, said last time we went HK disneyland, I bought a cap for my sis. Actually I bought the cap is for myself, yet he said I lied to him say I bought for my sis. Haiz... Then said about the T-shirt all that. VEXED!!!

Know they're tired after their trip, but can don't say things that made me cried? Tears were rolling down, just felt that though they're at home, I felt so empty and lonely. Wanted to talk lots of things to them, but they seem so busy. =( Though they're at home, I don't know why I can't sense their presence except for their noise and voice. Haiz...

Today wasn't a very good day, don't know why everything don't seem to fix up properly, like missing puzzles here and there. Just hope for a better tml I guess.

~Loneliness in me is still there, wonder when will it go off? ~

*If it's wrong to love u, then my heart just wouldn't let me be right*
11:25 PM

Monday, November 9, 2009 '

empty house~

My house is going to be really empty in just another 5 more days. My whole family except me and my bro will be going to hong kong this coming sat. My dad just won a lucky draw with a free airticket to hong kong. That's why he's bringing my mum, the 3 little ones and my sis to go there again. Since me and my bro just went not long ago, we will be staying here in singapore.

The feeling of loneliness is inside me, coz I know my house will be really quiet during this weekend up till nxt tues. My grandma will be coming to take care o me and my bro. And the whole house will not be as noisy and lively as now. I know I've grown up, but then never in my life have I experienced my house being so quiet. If my uncle doesn't stay with us, and ifmy grandma doesn't come and take care of us, I'll every every moment for that 4 days. Coz my house is really empty.

Oh well~ I just hope they'll have a safe journey to hong kong and come back safely too. I'll miss them pretty alot I guess. And as for sure, if i send them off, u can see my crying and crying non stop even if I reach home. Coz I can't bear to be separated from my parents and my twinees, and of coz bao yi and pei kuan. Awww~ I'm so gonna miss them. ='( While they are busy packing, I'm feeling a little sorrow.

~Nothing could describe my feelings now. A sense of little fear and the feelings of loneliness deep inside me~

*If it's wrong to love u, then my heart just wouldn't let me be right*
9:12 PM

Tuesday, November 3, 2009 '

sudden mixed feelings

Experienced a sudden feeling of sorrow... Don't know what's got into me, perhaps coz of the little dispute with my mum. And she ignored me from 8 plus till now, perhaps I should let it be like that. My dad and my mum maybe going to HK soon. Coz my dad won an air ticket to HK and he's planning to bring my mum and my 4 sis go. SInce I had go there before which was not long ago, I'm not included in the trip.

Oh well~ If they really go, left me and my bro at home. My mum is planning to ask my grandma come to my house to watch over the 2 of us. Coz she scared my bro wouldn't want to come home for that 3 nights. But if 6 of them really go, I bet I'm going to cry for that 4 days 3 nights. See how it goes~

Tml going for an interview for assistance teacher. Hope everything's fine for me, and I want that job too. Wish me good luck ya? ^^

*If it's wrong to love u, then my heart just wouldn't let me be right*
10:22 PM

Monday, November 2, 2009 '

jia you~

Tml shall be the day, or in fact it's today, 14 more hours to go. I know it's really tough for him to study for his retake, but then I believe he can do it ya? U have my support my dear, and I'll cheer for u. Just believe that u can do it ya? It doesn't really matter how much u know, what matter is that u have work hard for it, and study hard for it too. Tml just do your best, and I'm sure u can do it. ^^

3 papers to go ya? After these 3 papers, laogong can enjoy provided that u have really fought hard for it. And when u get your results next year, I'm sure u'll will be satisfied. Laopo support u harx. hehez... U have me by your side ya? Laogong Jia You!!!

For 4 months, I'm jobless and stay at home everyday to help my mum look after my twinees. They have grown, and super naughty at times. But then, my house is super lovely and lively with them around. They know how to call us and everytime we asked them to call us, the twinees will say, "da jie wo ai ni". Sweet right? ^^

Slacking through for my life now, but will soon get a job probably next week. Looking forward to work and for laogong to finish his retake. I just love the way we are, and will stick thru thick and thin tgt. I love u laogong~ ^^

~7 months 28 days, & it's still counting...~ n.n

*If it's wrong to love u, then my heart just wouldn't let me be right*
12:20 AM